Tuesday, October 29, 2013

I like real blog posts. 
I like when someone actually takes the time to open up even just a little bit. As much as I love another Paleo recipe or pictures of perfected fall crafts -- I like to hear from real people about real problems in life 
Because I can relate. 

Why don't we open up more? Why are we all so concerned with what other's are going to say or think or perceive of us more than we are that our words could possibly help someone in a similar situation. I am far more encouraged when I read or hear from a friend who's struggles are similar to mine than I am by her clean house or cute kid crafts....not that those are bad at all. But I wonder why we honestly open up so rarely if it is so valuable to our community of friends and family. I think it's because we think no one wants to see that mess....we want to live in some delusion that things look perfect like in a magazine. But that's not real life. And it certainly isn't my life. 

The danger with living in this state that things have to be "perfect" all the time means that when real life struggles and trials come our way they undo us. Instead of taking them in stride as a part of this life we allow our entire identity to be rattled by them. 

My life is always messy. I am short with my toddler, I waste time, I get tired of bouncing a baby around all day. My house is usually messy (unless I hear you're coming over then it gets cleaner in 10 minutes than it has all week!) My toddler watches more tv than I vowed she ever would and projects than I have started are strewn throughout my house. I am commonly unshowered and unrested. I am unrested because I waste time on the computer or on my phone when my children are distracted instead of taking time with the Lord. I am short with them because I am not taking time to find rest and refueling from God who is the only one who can provide the strength for this job. 
And the other things just come with having children :) 

I have been reading "Loving The Little Years" by Rachel Jankovic and wow...have been convicted, challenged and encouraged in this tiny read. I want to share this snippet from today about motherhood:

"The opportunities for growth and refinement abound here--but you have to be willing. You have to open your heart to the tumble. As you deal with your children, deal with yourself first. This is what it looks like and feels like to walk with God, as a mother. God treats us with great kindness as we fail daily. He takes the long view of our sin--knowing that every time we fail and repent, we grow in our walk with Him. It is easy for us to accept this, because our sins are, well, ours.
But our children sin against us, annoy us, and mess up our stuff. We want to hold it against them, complain about them (if only to ourselves), and feel put upon by their sin. We have a much harder time accepting that every failure from them is a wonderful opportunity for repentance and growth an not an opportunity for us to exact penance. 
It is no abstract thing--the state of your heart is the state of your home. You cannot harbor resentment secretly toward your children and expect their hearts to be submissive and tender. You cannot be greedy with your time and expect them to share their toys. And perhaps most importantly, you cannot resist your opportunities to be corrected by God and expect them to receive correction from you."

This has been my prayer these days. To allow God to work in my life and accept the growth that motherhood demands instead of fighting to regain control and work things out my way. Motherhood and child rearing can bring so many things of our own heart to light for us to work through with God and grow from OR it can make us bitter, unhappy, frazzled with the chaos of our life and selfish. 
Anyways! Hope you are challenged as I am to take the words from this great book to heart! 

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